You ever look at society and notice how obsessed we are at changing our bodies? Being stressed? Being busy? Working towards something? Ever noticed how society tells us we need to change ourselves?
If you’re a brit you might notice how awful we are at taking compliments or praising ourselves. We are surrounded and shaped by society and cultural norms.
Sometimes this Is a sensible thing, cultural and social norms are put in place to tame our animal instincts, Yano the sort that make us act like ‘wild animals’ which we basically are at the end of the day. So I guess that’s a good thing, like stopping us having sex in the middle of streets or getting run over by cars if we don’t wait for the green man.
I get those rules right, but I don’t get the social norms that tell us we can’t be truly happy with ourselves and who we are.
You ever seen someone oozing confidence and heard someone say they are arrogant?
Or praise themselves and be called stuck up?
Or get a compliment, accept it and someone thinks they are up their own arse?
Or seeing someone having fun when newly single instead of crying into a tub of Ben and Jerry’s?
I don’t know about you but im really really bored with us not being allowed to be OK.
Not allowed to be happy in ourselves because diet culture is swamping us, not allowed to be happy because ‘life is hard and then you die’, not allowed to move our bodies ‘just because’ or eat something ‘just because’, not allowed to love what we do because you ‘work to pay the bills’, not allowed to make our own decisions because society isn’t ready for that yet.
We spend our whole lives making decisions but we don’t often realise some decisions are being made for us by society, trends or big companies that earn the big bucks.
Think about it, everything we do is a decision…It’s always a yes or no and if it’s a maybe then that is a no until you say yes.
Hungry? Yes? You eat. Do you want to go to the cinema? yes, so you go. You’re tired, do you sleep? Yes or no.
So if we spend our whole time making decisions why don’t we make the decision to be happy and comfortable in every decision we make?
That goes for emotions by the way, we decide how we feel. We can decide how angry we get when someone does us wrong, we can decide how sad we get when something comes to an end and we can decide what makes us excited or scared.
Unfortunately, the decisions aren’t as black and white as choosing because we are swamped with social normals and cultures telling us what we should choose to feel and often without us even knowing it.
Who chooses to hate their body? You didn’t consciously choose that, unfortunately diet culture taught us to do that and our subconscious or unconscious mind chose to take it in.
You see, we aren’t always conscious of the decisions we make and that’s why I want to make a change to allow us to make a deeper connection with ourselves and our minds and love ourselves and get to know ourselves so we can take back some confidence and control.
I want you to know that it’s ok to think you look bloody fabulous.
I want you to know that it’s ok to love your job, it’s ok to not be busy and it’s ok to eat that cake.
I want you to know that it’s ok to love what you love and dislike what you dislike but I urge you to make sure that it’s coming from your heart and not from a current trend.
I want you to know that it’s ok to know what’s good for you and express that.
I want you to know that it’s ok to do something different to the rest of those around you – in fact that’s brilliant, that’s what makes humans so amazing – the diversity amongst us.
I want you to know it’s ok to feel sad and to know when you need some extra help and support.
I want you to know it’s ok to do things that make you happy and avoid what makes you feel sad.
I want you to know it’s ok to just do you.
I want you to know that it’s ok to be Ok with who you are and celebrate that.
I urge you to next time someone or something makes you feel in a way that you can’t express yourself or be the true you to sit back and to remember how we make decisions. If someone has upset you, that’s fine… allow yourself to be upset but make the decision on how long for and to what extent.
If you find yourself comparing your life to the instagram famous girls and it’s making you question your body and your happiness… accept the emotion, remember we can make a choice, remember we can make the decision to avoid that feeling and then decide how you will avoid that, can you unfollow them in a way to create more happiness for yourself?
I urge us all to start making the decision to make our own decisions.
Here’s to expressing ourselves, all of our individual weirdness, all of our different shaped bodies and all of our different interests and being absolutely ok with it.